As much as I detest Valentine’s Day, it seems as good a time as any to write about love. It’s rather a bizarre concept, since it encapsulates so many different ideas. Most other languages actually have dozens of words for “love” to describe its many incarnations.
I think that it is important to point out the distinction between feeling love and showing love in a “romantic” way. Showing love includes gestures like flowers and chocolate and often even saying “I love you.” Feeling love is a much deeper thing- it’s liking how something or someone makes you feel or act. It’s not even quite the feeling of being “attracted” to someone because we all know that following attraction isn’t always in our best interest (Fatal Attraction, anyone? If that’s love, be very afraid this evening). Love really is the most pure element on earth because in its truest form, it causes us as humans to feel the most positive power there is.
How? Science, my friends. It is science. The reason for these positive powers are not only good vibes you send into the universe, but also oxytocin hormones- the opposite of cortisol (stress) hormones. But good news for you single ladies and gentlemen out there: you can generate oxytocin in many ways and reap the same benefits of love without having to put on a fancy dress or pay for an expensive dinner!
Love is not just something for two people to share. I am very wary of the concept of bestowing it all upon one person- it’s a bit selfish, and also potentially extremely destructive (putting the proverbial eggs all in one basket, so to speak). If you are in a genuine, healthy relationship with someone and you feel real feelings of love toward that person, great! But don’t keep it all for yourselves- the rest of the world is just as deserving of love as your S.O. is!
Don’t focus all of your positive energy on one person; send it into the world for everyone. This sounds airy-fairy and sort of nonsensical, but the power of positivity is frequently underestimated. Karma is a real thing- but hey, even if you’re a skeptic what do you have to lose by being kind and pleasant to people?
Here are some ways that you can increase your oxytocin to generate more love to share with the world:
- Appreciation: In the same way that you appreciate things about a person you love, you can appreciate things about the world and get the same or even more enjoyment from it- just from enjoying things like a warm cup of tea or a nice walk.
- Give Back: Just help someone who needs help- carrying boxes, cooking dinner, whatever.
- Puppies: Well, it doesn’t have to be puppies. Positive contact with any living thing generates oxytocin!
- Meditation and mantras: Keep your thinking positive!
- Chocolate and mud: It’s true, they both have lecithin- a chemical used by many homeopathic practitioners to boost your mood. So eat a few truffles or run around barefoot for awhile!
- Sex: Hey, it is the #1 oxytocin-generating activity. Just throwing it out there.
- Anything that makes you truly happy: If you’re happy, you’re more likely to exude honesty, generosity and empathy, which are similar effects to those of oxytocin anyway!